Posted by: tranalist | March 7, 2007

Momma didn’t raise no cook

Oh Lord, I’ve gone and done it again. My new title should be The Absent Minded Chef (quite a catchy title for a TV food show)! This makes twice in my past two attempts to cook that I’ve gone and messed it up.

                                                                                                                                                                                                                 The first time was when baking a cake, a task I’ve done many times before with great success (seriously, how hard can it be to make a cake out of the box?!). I poured in the oil and water and thought, “Dang, that’s a lot more liquid than I’m used to…” Satisfied that it was because I was using a smaller bowl than normal, I commenced beating the batter, which looked really soupy. It was only after the cake was in the oven that I realized I had used a 2 cup cup measure, thus doubling the amount of water the recipe called for. I left the cake in for a long time hoping to bake some water out of it, but alas, it was useless, the cake was mushy and unsalvageable.

                                                                                                                                                                                                            Tonight I was throwing a casserole together, trying to be nice by making dinner for the madre. I got lost in thought singing to Les Miserable, and as I was making the layers, I once again thought to myself, “Hmm…there sure isn’t enough meat to make 3 layers.” Figuring I had used too large a casserole dish, I settled for just 2 layers and popped it in the oven. All of the sudden the 2 cans of black beans that were supposed to be added to the meat stared me in the face.

                                                                                                                                                                                                              Oooops. It sure isn’t gonna be the world’s best casserole.

                                                                                                                                                                                                                    25 minutes later, I opened the oven to remove my casserole and started laughing. The thing had shrunk…it looked like bread that forgot to rise. Mom asked me what was so funny and I told her about the black beans. We laughed as I served up 2 lifeless lumps on a couple of plates and you know what…it didn’t taste half bad!



  1. Sounds like a taste only a mother could love.

    As for the cake thing, just call it pudding and serve it with whipped cream…a party favourite.

    Now why the hell am I giving cooking advice?…

  2. Hahaha. Yeah, why ARE you giving me cooking advice? Maybe it has something to do with your apparent love for food. Very clever idea for the cake. Next time I botch it up, I’ll make sure to keep some whip cream handy.

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