Posted by: tranalist | January 27, 2008

A year in review

2007 can be summarized in one word: eventful. A serious relationship ended, my mom passed away, I got a new job, and moved a couple of times, just to touch upon the major stuff. I realize that in everything, there is always a lesson to be had and I have learned a good deal that has grown and matured me as an individual, allowing me to approach each day with a little more wisdom than before.

Patience, being slow to anger, living out God’s love, asking Him to reveal to me His heart for people.

A perfect example was a good friend of mine and I not being able to meet up for months. Every attempt was thwarted for one reason or another. I had planned on telling her how hurt and disappointed I had felt in how she was choosing to handle some things that was beginning to take a toll on our friendship.

In hindsight, I realize it wasn’t until I began asking God what His heart for her was, Him revealing it to me and feeling so much compassion and love for her, that we were finally able to sit down and have a great conversation. God had to get both of our hearts ready for the ensuing conversation. When she started opening up and being vulnerable, I wept as I told her God’s heart for her and how her recent choices weren’t His best for her. She listened, sighed and said, “I know…” and then, as we joked about our patterns, she laughingly said, “Lara, how do you put up with me? Are you ever going to give up on me? I can’t imagine what I must put you through.”

No, I won’t ever give up on her. Though I may not agree with her choices at times, I won’t give up on her, because I truly want what’s best for her.

We hugged as we parted with “I love yous” and later that night she sent me a message that was so touching and exactly the thing I was desiring to talk to her about, but never got around to. “I’m sorry I wasn’t there for you when your mom passed away. Please forgive me for being so selfish. Thank you for being my guardian angel and an inspiring friend. I truly love and appreciate you.” Even though I know I don’t deserve half of what she said, words have power and I so appreciated her repentant heart and encouraging words.

Conversely, however, I had another friend decide to, quite unexpectedly and harshly, point out in a very hurtful way all of my flaws, to which I unwisely responded quickly and in anger. The dialogue continued until the situation escalated to a destructive level. I was reminded of the proverb, “A soft answer turns away wrath, but a harsh word stirs up anger.” I regret my part and learned a valuable lesson in patience and wanting to rectify “injustices.” Sometimes God’s gotta do that on His own and in His timing. I think how differently things might have turned out had I just asked God to reveal His heart for this person and waited to respond until He had done so. It’s so humbling and contradictory to human nature, but humility is something I ask God for daily, because I know that pride can lead to a path of destruction.

Yes, I am thankful that God has taught me these things at such a young age and I’m thankful that I am able to learn from my mistakes. No one is perfect, and luckily, loves covers a multitude of sins. I know now that we must give a little (or a lot of) grace to others, because we’re going to need a heck of a lot of it from them in return.

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